Teens have a lot to talk to their friends over the phone and face-to-face, but somehow when It comes to parents they run short of words. Also, because parents sometimes ask off beam kinds of questions, like you may ask them, “Did you have fun at your friend’s place?” and you’ll most likely hear, “Yea” that’s about it. And if you ask them, “How was school today?” they’ll most probably say “It was fine.” The key to get your teens to say more than just ‘yes’ ‘no’ ‘ok’, is to ask open-ended questions, in a very non-interrogative way. Here are 4 types of questions you can ask your teen to kick start a conversation:
1. What is Your Favorite…
You may think that you know each and everything about your child. You may know it when they were kids but as soon as they enter teenage their likes and dislike take a 360 degree turn. So, take an interest in your teen’s favorite things and get to know about them. You can ask them about anything from their favorite desert, to a movie, color or sport. Be all ears when they start talking about it.
2. What Do You Think About…
Teens love when their opinion is given some importance. Ask for their opinion on a book, a game you watched together, a current event, or movies. Like, ‘What do you think about Jurassic park?’, ‘Who do you think is going to win the election?’ etc.
3. How Do You Picture Your…
Ask a simple question ‘How do you picture your future?’ Ask them about their future dreams and hopes. What profession would they want to take in the future, how do they plan on achieving it? Don’t give them a feel that you are being pushy; be very open to their ideas.
4. Do you remember the time when…
Take a trip down the memory lane with them. On purpose talk about the happy times in their past to encourage them, talk about things you remember and things you don’t. Like, “Do you remember the time you got your first summer job? Or, “When did you really feel proud of yourself?” This will help them focus on their emotions and will give you more insight on how they feel about life.
Don’t leave the conversations hanging
Awkward silences in conversation can really kill the mood for further talking. Don’t just stop the conversation once he/she has answered a question; keep the flow going as long as you’re sitting together. Also, your teens will only open up to you if they feel that their thoughts are safe with you. A strong communication is the pillar to every parent-child relationship. You can know a lot about their likes and dislikes by monitoring their online life with parental control apps. Last but not least, don’t be judgmental or start a lecture once they start talking to you, you don’t always have tos be a parent. At times they need you to be their friend. So, keep your fingers crossed and hope for the best!